Connolly’s Corner

Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙏𝙬𝙤 𝙎𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙨 – 𝙀𝙙 𝘾𝙤𝙧𝙧𝙖𝙙𝙤

Charles unconsciously lies to himself…

Love is heaven. Love is bliss. Love is life. Love is everything. Love is hell. Love is cruel. Love is a curse. Love is the death of a heart gone cold. One never knows how anything is going to turn out, but one always hopes for the best. Sometimes though, it is not hope that we feel, but “factual knowledge”. For the sake of simplicity, let’s keep this heterosexual. Somewhere in the world, there is a man. Somewhere else in the world there is a woman. Neither knows the other, but each has one thing in common: they are alone. They muddle through in the way that we do. The travelator of life. The zombie conveyor belt. For without love, there is little but this. For the sake of argument, let’s call these two souls Brian and Ethel. Brian likes gardening. It keeps him busy, and takes his mind off the loneliness of life. The flowers are his friends. The crops are his sustenance – in more ways than ones. But ultimately he is numb. He is empty. He is also lazy. He just doesn’t put himself about. In the words of Arctic Monkeys: “Brian, top marks for not tryin’”. And so, the beat goes on. Ethel, on the other hand spends most of her time in the kitchen. A plump lady, who likes to bake cakes. But with no one to bake for, it feels like a fool’s errand. She simply gets a little more plump. When she can eat no more, she sits at the kitchen table, smoking (she has the idea this will make her lose weight), and staring out of the window at the neighbour’s garden (for her own leaves much to be desired). She sighs and puts the kettle on. Or the Kethel. While coffee enriches and invigorates the soul, tea was invented to pass the time. Fact. As the water is brought to the boil, the whistle tells her so and insistingly prompts her to remove the kethel from the hob. She does so. But as she does so, she catches a glimpse of a shiny bonce. A polished noggin. It belongs to the body of man busy pruning. How had she not noticed Brian before? Had she been too busy staring at his roses? Was she pondering on her doubts about the quantity of flour? Be it flour or flowers, the tea is now far down on her to-do list.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙒𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣 – 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨

Charles knows what women are like…

Women. Let’s talk about women. “You sexist, chauvinist pig! How dare you-” WAIT!!! I haven’t said anything yet. Damned trigger people. You see a man talking about women, and instantly you’re on the alert, ready to pounce. “But you’re obviously going to be saying something negative, otherwise why would you-“ WHY am I OBVIOUSLY going to say something negative…? What makes you think that? Am I that pessimistic that I only speak negatively of things? “A woman is not a THING!!” Yes, yes, I know that. That’s not what I meant, and you know it. Simmer down, and let me speak. Good God, if I said I was going to talk about black people, is that instantly no-go territory because I’m white? What if I was going to praise Marvin Gaye, Michael Jackson, Stevie Wonder, Dr. Dre and John Legend? “Oh, well that’s okay then”. So let me say something first. THEN you can decide whether pouncing is the necessary action. So. Ahem. Let’s talk about women.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙑𝙖𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝘿𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢 – 𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝘾𝙧𝙪𝙢𝙗𝙨, 𝘾𝙡𝙤𝙪𝙙𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙮

Charles explains, for folk’s sake…!

I have heard that foreigners learn English from songs. Whilst I can see this being a sensible technique – “betcha by golly, wow” – it can have its drawbacks. I am he as you are he, as you are me and we are all together. Wise words. But complicated words, nevertheless. And it probably doesn’t really help much… There is you, and there is me. And there is them. There is a person, there are persons. There are people and there are peoples. And I would imagine this at times to be rather confusing. There is singular, and there is plural. Take a sheep, for example. Just hold it for a moment. Heavy, right? Now imagine carrying two of them. Two sheeps? Nope. Two sheep. Why? Because it is. Okay, you can put them down now. What about a fish? Well, what ABOUT a fish? Certainly lighter than a sheep. No legs to kick you in the groin. Have another one. Two fishes? Nope. Two fish. unexplainable, but that’s how it is. How about when you go on holiday and you’re still waiting for your two suitcases to ‘ker-chunk’ on to the sturdy conveyor belt at the airport. Surely that’s two luggages, no? No. You might even have 10, but it will always be luggage. This comes under a peculiar term called ‘uncountable nouns’. Other such uncountable nouns include water, bread, flour, rubbish, research and sand. Put all these together and you get a recipe to avoid. In fact, it can be so confusing that even native speakers have started changing the language and incorporating the foreign way of speaking. Pluralising everything. One such example that IS correct though, comes back to where I started. We say “they” when we don’t want to mention a specific gender. Despite “them” being one singular person.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙒𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙔𝙤𝙪 – 𝙁𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙅𝙤𝙨𝙝𝙪𝙖

Charles speaks frankly…

Throughout the noughties and early tens, I was obsessed with one particular producer. It seemed to me like he was capable of anything. Whatever he got his hands on, he would turn to greatness. He would make a good thing better. He would make it his own. I also wondered if the artists he worked with minded that each record he produced sounded very much like a “haven’t mentioned his name yet” album, rather than an album by that particular artist. His stamp. I don’t think they minded though, because if he was involved it was pretty much a guarantee that the record would be fabulous, popular and reviewed well. Praised to the skies, even! The artists he has worked with include Radiohead, Beck, Zero 7, Travis (never mind), Air and a slightly more obscure artist by the name of Paul McCartney. There are of course others, but this is enough to be getting on with for now. While these artists are hugely different from one another, there is something warm and cosy, yet grand and impressive about all of them. This is what this producer manages with everything he touches. His name? Nigel Godrich.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙑𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙖𝙞𝙣 – 𝘽𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙈𝙖𝙧𝙨𝙖𝙡𝙖

Charles rises above…

Something came to my attention a few weeks back. I am not universally loved. I know! Quite impossible to believe, but there you have it. You can close your mouth now; the shock has passed. But let’s delve. Those of you who weren’t shocked by this news are probably already swearing and shouting at the screen that my arrogance knows no bounds: “He actually thought everyone LOVED him!! Twat”. And these are the very people who seemingly very much misunderstand me. It’s a joke (laugh with me?)! But they wish not to understand me, of course, because then they couldn’t continue enjoying the private maligning of moi. It seems that some people believe I am against them. That I am above them in some way or other. Just because I was educated somewhat decently and I’m able to express myself with words, I am seen to some as being some sort of snobby toff. Or toffy snob, but that sounds like a sweet Yorkshire treat from the 1950s: a Toffee Snob, probably nicknamed ‘a Londoner’.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙑𝙞𝙫𝙖 𝙇𝙖 𝙑𝙞𝙩𝙖 – 𝙂𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙚 𝙎𝙠𝙞𝙙𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚

Charles lives life to the max…

“Life is for living”! We have heard it all too many times. But let’s be realistic here. Most people don’t actually really think like this. The more standard approach is probably: life is fine for some, but we’ve got to pay the bills and sort out tax returns. Or as Lennon put it, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”. This is all so wrong. I mean Lennon is right, but you hopefully know what I mean. Despite what the believers say, we only have one shot at this. And although life is famously “too short”, we are quite generously given around 80 or so years these days in which to “do” it – not really THAT short… I have always found it rather ironic that when we’re young and agile most of us sit at a desk and work for most of our lives, but as soon as we hit around 65, we are allowed to stop working and enjoy the rest of our lives. By which point you are unable to do anything you might still wish to do because your limbs are aching and you can’t see or hear properly… It would almost make more sense to do it the other way around. To do everything you might want to do in life while young, and then sit at a desk and work when you’re older. The mind is usually more experienced and wise in the latter years – if it hasn’t gone completely, of course. Sitting is no problem at age 75. So easy, I could do it standing on my head! Or maybe not. The vital flaw in this theory is that it would be somewhat of an anticlimax… One has to have something to look forward to. Wheelchair races, perhaps…? Perhaps not. This theory will forever remain a theory and is not going to happen. So the point is, we must USE life. It is there for the taking! It could be anything from travel to challenge to mastering an art or craft. Just anything, really. The important thing is enjoyment and fulfilment. A sense of accomplishment is ideal, but if one even has a smile on one’s face, a goal has been achieved. Life is not something to have been resentfully “got through”. As Lennon said, we often plan to do things, but rarely actually get around to doing them. That’s not enough. Unless you particularly enjoy planning, in which case you should consider a career in management or as a P.A. I personally do not want anything to do with management. Planning is good, but there is a tendency to have a forever growing bucket list (there’s that word again – always with the bucket).

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙋𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙛 – 𝙋𝙖𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙠 𝘼𝙝𝙡𝙢

Charles dons his helmet…

Among episodes of Cheers, House and Malcolm in the Middle, I have recently been watching a BBC documentary series called Simon Reeve’s South America. In as few as 5 episodes, Reeve covers everything from the beauty to the chaos of the entire continent of South America. We started atop a tepui (pronounced correctly) in Guyana. Its footage was truly staggering, it barely looked real. It was a breathtaking experience even on the smallest of screens. But as with most things these days, the plot didn’t stay picturesque for long. We were taken slightly further East and South, where rainforests had been ripped apart due to the greed of man. The hunt for gold. Mining is both for the rich and for the poor. For the rich, to get richer. For the poor, out of sheer hope and desperation. But it was only after episode 3 (my journey thus far), that I realised the extent of the mess in South America, and more specifically, Bolivia. Cocaine is the problem. Well, really, corrupt embezzling government not governing, is the problem. It showed us an elderly female poverty-stricken farmer having to strip 28 kilos of coca leaves with her bare hands in the burning sun to make a total of around £3.50. I’m not going to bother translating into other currencies, because you know this is not much. In fact, it is around half the price of a pint in London. There is nothing more these farmers can do in the burning sun, and so they are forced to feed the ongoing worldwide drug problem. Cocaine and gold fund most of the continent – not the best national strategy. The worst point though was in the highest inhabited town in the world. So high that altitude sickness is common. Ungoverned La Rinconada has raw sewage spilling across mud “roads”. It has sprung up in recent decades with people’s desperate hope of finding golden nuggets. A truly inhospitable, extremely dangerous place, as it snows ferociously with strong winds, still people keep digging and breaking rocks. You can see in their eyes that they know they will never find anything. Or anything that will make a difference. It was as if watching a soul wither and die inside a wandering corpse, wasting energy on nothing but cold toil and hot tears. I was left quiet, sickened and saddened. Did I therefore start an immediate protest stream on Twitter? No, because that is not what I do. Because it has little point other than creating awareness. It does not help anything. It would only make others feel miserable. Besides, who would listen to ME? So what did I do? I thought. And I felt. And I realised how damned spoilt we all are in the modern western world.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙒𝙖𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙖 𝙏𝙧𝙖𝙞𝙣 (𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩. 𝙋𝙚𝙧 𝘼𝙡𝙚𝙭𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣) – 𝙈𝙖𝙩𝙨 𝘿𝙚𝙧𝙣𝙖́𝙣𝙙

Charles is ‘appy with his choice…

Mobile telephones. We all have one. I mean we ALL have one. It doesn’t matter if you’re 14 or 82. Rich or poor. You most definitely have one. You may not use it much; it may never leave your hands. But you have one. It might be over a decade old; it might be the very latest model. But still, you have one. Do you charge it 3 times a day or once every 3 days? Whatever your charging regime, you have a mobile phone. Do you strictly use yours for calls and texts? Just like the days before phones got smart? Those simpler, dumber days? Are you thumbing away on work emails? Are you still adamant that Temple Run is the coolest game known to man? Perhaps you’re addicted to Googling random facts? Do you find your life being sucked down the drain by social media feeds? Is your scrolling thumb feeling positively arthritic? Or how about music? Do you crave the latest hits by the biggest stars? Are you still searching for “the new sound”? What about the mighty array of camera lenses residing grumpily on the back of the electronic slab? For those with an older machine, let me tell you that modern phones have more than one lens on the back – I know; crazy. So yeah, are you obsessed with taking snaps yet despising people who call them “snaps” (because they’re “works of art”)? Are you the type to take one photo, pause for mild contentment, then put the phone back in the pocket? Or are you the type to take a whole series of photos, then plop them into an album labelled “To Be Edited”…? Do you then open your Photography Folder to browse the plethora of photo and video editing apps? Do you stare into the abyss that is YouTube? Maybe you’re simply addicted to “window shopping”, but never actually buy anything? In other words, living in a dream world… All this barely scrapes the surface of modern mobile phones’ capabilities.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙔𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙉𝙤𝙩 𝙊𝙠 (𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩. 𝙍𝙮𝙖𝙣 𝙍𝙤𝙣𝙠𝙨𝙡𝙚𝙮) – 𝙋𝙖𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙇𝙖𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙣

Charles is getting on with it…

What is comfort? Is it cushions and ice cream? Or how about an evening with the lads? Maybe it’s an idyllic day in the countryside? Could it be that you just like to sit secluded in your car, listening to the best of The Carpenters? Well, comfort can be all these things and more. But there is one thing these all have in common, They are short-lived. It’s not a way of life. You know when someone asks “How are you?”, “How’s it going?”, “How’s life?”, “How’s it hanging?”, “You all right?”, “What’s happening (man)?”, “You good?”, or “What a gwan?”? You habitually and automatically reply something along the lines of Fine, Good, Okay, All right, Alright, Can’t complain, Not too bad, Could be worse, Surviving, You know how it is, Muddling through, Mustn’t grumble, Getting on with it, and so forth. On the surface, these are all pretty positive replies. But the underlying feeling is stagnancy or worse. I’ve always wondered about the expression “Not too bad”. It’s meant to be positive, but if you think about it, it’s overwhelmingly negative. “Things are bad, but not TOO bad”…! Anyway. To be fair, one main reason for an answer like this, is to cut things short and be modest. After all, they only asked out of politeness. They didn’t want a genuine reply! The French have it perfectly: “Ça va?” – “Oui, ça va?” – “Alors”. That’s “How are you?” – “Yes, how are you?” – “So”. They don’t even bother to answer the question, It’s just a case of getting through the mandatory chit-chat as quickly and efficiently as possible.

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Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙒𝘼𝙆𝙀 𝙐𝙋! (& 𝙎𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙚) – 𝙁𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙠𝙡𝙞𝙣 & 𝘽𝙚𝙡𝙡

Charles loses an idol…

Monday morning. For Mondays are when I write these things. I woke up – an achievement in itself. Quick scan of the phone before making breakfast. A sensible person would perhaps make breakfast first, but ya know – I’m just so young and modern! Bleary eyed and stumbly (I would say zombie-like, but those scary days are behind us), I look at the messages that I know I will have to read again when I am awake enough to reply. Get rid of the red dots all over the screen (those with iPhones will know the curse), and so to the ritual of the coffee. Quite amazing what that smell does for one’s soul. NOW I am ready to start the day. Time to look at the “paper”. It’s an app (ugh). What news lurks in store for me? What shenanigans have people been up to? What catastrophes have encroached on our peaceful land? Ugh: Trump, Harris, Harris, Trump. NEXT! Politics politics. Economy economy. NEXT! Baby switched at birth. NEXT! Oh come on, there must be something. Oh JESUS!! Ah gawd. And I am stopped mid slurp. That hollow feeling, as if my chest holds only lungs and nothing more. Our great gilt past continues to evaporate, leaving little but a plastic, mediocre present. Quincy Jones has died. He was 91.

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