𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿 – this week: Psycho (in my Hyundai) – bigbaldben

Welcome all to 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿, a series of weekly reviews by Charles Connolly – an artist in his own right. Here, Charles delves into the greatest brand new singles brought to you by the best unsigned artists on our electrifying and eclectic set of 𝙉𝙚𝙬 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙥𝙤𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 playlists.

𝙋𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝𝙤 (𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙃𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙞) – 𝙗𝙞𝙜𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙙𝙗𝙚𝙣

Charles is just being friendly…

Here’s one potential way of life that isn’t necessarily the same as your own (or even MY own, but is perhaps more a male way of thinking):

When we’re young, we have loads of friends. It’s normal. Apologies to those of you who didn’t when you were young. But it is – I think – pretty normal. As we grow a little older, many of those friends fall by the wayside. It’s nothing intentional or conscious; it just happens. Then work, life and romantic relationships take over. Friends become less important and more an optional extra. Then you just forget all about them entirely. And ya know what…? You’re absolutely fine with that. Friends just aren’t that necessary anymore. Or so it seems…

Pootling along without a care in the world, those young adult years with the girl (or boy) of your dreams, everything seems peachy. Sure, you don’t meet up with all those friends you used to, but you’re utterly fine. And you’re sure THEY’RE not losing any sleep over it. This is pretty much the status quo for quite a time. There’s even a blob or two that comes along, and STILL you’re fine. Sorry, “blob” is my word for baby. But eventually, something changes in you. You want more. And I don’t mean money or power, or rich experiences as you travel through the great unknowns in the deepest, darkest crevices (or crevasses) of the potentially unexplored world. I mean that you want something BACK. Something you used to have. Your dignity? That’s long gone, and it ain’t never comin’ back. Your hair? Ditto. Your posture and somewhat svelte physique? Well, this can be worked on, but it’s hardly a craving, is it… I mean something much simpler. Something that demands a lot less physical exertion. Something so honest, casual and timeless. It comes in the form of Ross, Rachel, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Phoebe… That’s right: Friends. That thing we nonchalantly cast aside and took for granted.

Friendship is without a doubt one of the most important things in life. Not necessarily hundreds or even scores of them, but a small close-knit band of them. Even just one or two – that’s all that’s necessary. But it IS absolutely necessary. It’s a bond, a chat, a good vibe. A time to vent, a time to lark about. A thing of warmth and reassurance. A place for honesty and frankness. Friends are who you speak with when talking to yourself just isn’t enough. While there’s a connection, there can be a fresh outlook or perspective. This friend is no Yes-man – otherwise you might as WELL be talking to yourself. A friend can make you feel less like a pawn and more like a courageous knight, themselves being the steadfast rook. That grounding is oh-so vital, hence the responsibility in being someone’s closest friend – they CAN’T let you down. And in being a traditional two-way friendship, YOU can’t let THEM down either… “I’ll be there for you, ‘cause you’re there for me too” – wise words from The Rembrandts. It’s funny: not long ago you used not to need this kind of companion. You were perfectly fine on your lonesome. But now, you find yourself going from lonesome to lonely. You just can’t be alone. Friends have made you a better person. You’re calmer, kinder and more fun. And yet when you’re alone, the old you seeps back in. So, when are you actually often alone…? In the car, maybe? Maybe… The resentment, the anger, the frustration, it all oozes out of the glove compartment (do we still actually call it that…? Ha!). You start to think. You start to OVERthink. You mutter and mumble to yourself, and then you scream at another driver (even though YOU were at fault). The devil emerges from within, and you yearn for a friend to come and put out the fire. But then you think back to a time when you were absolutely fine without those friends. You didn’t need them at all! YOU were that rook. What happened?! Did you get weaker and more frail as the years went by? Maybe, maybe not. The knowledge of “what happened” is something that frankly can’t be known. The funny thing is, you might not want to go back to those more resilient times. You’re probably better off as you are now.

There is however something to be said for being on one’s own. It’s often when we feel at our most free. Free from judgement. Free from self-awareness. Like when you escape life, once again dive into your car, lock the doors, press the “drive” button, then press the PLAY button. Firstly, the music takes over and you scream along to your favourite hits until you become hoarse (then scream along some more). Secondly, I have evidently never driven a car, because there is no such thing as a “drive” button. Yet. Anyway, THIS is when you let off steam and become a little bit more like yourself again. When you’re alone. The thing is, you might not like that “self” of yours. And before long, you need people again. You need company and interaction with others. It’s a balance, I suppose. A little bit of me-time; a little bit of us-time.

Let’s finally get to the music. Ben Wagner is the name of the game this week. But you’ll know him as bigbaldben, all lowercase because he’s just understated that way. In all seriousness, underneath that bigbald exterior lies an understated, affable chap of a man. A really modest soul with a gentle temperament. But when this Pennsylvanian rocks, he surely does ROCK!!! He’s extremely fun, you see. Please welcome our very own BFG (no, not Big Fat Guy), the Big Friendly Giant that is bigbaldben!!! It has been two whole years since Ben last appeared in my Corner, and since then he has released an entire 7-track MP (medium player) – ‘Thresher’ – piecemeal. But that’s old news. That was released as a whole in January. Get with the times, man! It’s April, dude! Wrong again – It’s May, dude! But on the 29th of April, Ben released what I can only assume to be the first of the next. The single is called ‘Psycho (in my Hyundai)’. But of course it is. What ELSE could you call a song about everything I said in the first few paragraphs…? Yup, unless I have got absolutely everything entirely wrong (plausible), that is exactly what this song is about. Friends, lone time and how it has all changed over the years. But ya know what else has changed over the years? Ben’s music! Sure, he’s still that heavy rocker with a penchant for intentionally sculpted dissonance, but this track has something different. It is a more honest, more adulty version of Ben. Normally he would never be seen without his triple or quadruple-tracked harmonies. He was never comfortable with the sound of his voice without that pad of harmonies. We all love those harmonies (and don’t worry, they’re still there in parts), but sometimes as artists we need to change. We need to journey. Sitting still is good in small doses. Then RUN!! And we can’t run very fast with a pack of harmonies on our back. Sometimes we need to strip to that singular unadorned vocal. It’s called “slimlining” (it’s not but it might as well be).

Middle-age is a tricky time in life (so I’m told – ahem). Some will decide never to change anything ever again – you tried that once, and look what happened). While others will feel suffocated by staleness, and finally bite the bullet. The pill is newness. Or in this case, the pill was singing lessons. Blimey! Who does that?? Who admits to themselves that they might benefit from singing lessons? Who Googles local singing lessons in their fifties?! Shall I tell you? Ben, that’s who. Ben was man enough to recognise and acknowledge what he saw as his own weaknesses (none of US thought that!) and thus sought advice in the form of singing lessons. Bloody amazing. Truly, hats off to you for doing this. ESPECIALLY in being a rocker. It had never even occurred to me that rock singers would train their voice, but of COURSE they do!! How else could they belt it out night after night, year after year, decade after decade?! Anyway, this training evidently gave Ben some new found confidence to try what he hadn’t really done before: let the backing vocals sit in the background, or even have a break for a bit. Good on ya, Ben! And ya know what? It turns out, less is indeed more.

This is much as it would sound if Ben was rocking out in his car, because in real life there is only one Ben. Until now, I have always heard Ben’s voice as a delicious chord. Somehow now it is more tactile. More human. I feel the words more because I can hear the human behind it all. But speaking of the human behind it all, this song ain’t a cappella… There is, of course, his quintessential guitar chugging. There is explosively slow and snappy drumming. There is that rumbling bass from a bassist who so desperately wishes he was Ben on guitar; coming up the rear, as it were. But as soon as we get to the first verse, aside from Ben’s vocals, we get what sounds like heavily filtered drums from a drummer desperately wishing to be a drum machine. I must say, though, the most impressive thing for me is the inventive writing coagulated with the guitar layers. Ben really knows what he’s doing. One thing I’ve always loved about ALL of Ben’s music is how deliberate everything is. This is song-craft with defined production. Nothing just happens to happen. There’s one repeated harmonic that reminds me of an ominous heart rate monitor in an X-Files episode – just before a black-eyed monster shoots out of the comatose victim’s throat. Or something. There’s a beep in there that sounds cool – coulda just said that. The irony of having fewer audible vocal harmonies, is that I find myself singing what would previously have been there – the harmony. But that’s because I do that. Not because it needs that. As to the actual overall sound, it’s pretty bloody flawless, due to producer/engineer Jack Fawdry, otherwise known as Jxckfruit (yes, that’s the spelling). Who he? Well, he’s worked with Sony and Universal, as well as the group Busted. I was very nearly the drummer of Busted. Or was it McFly? Either way, that’s a story for another time. The point is, Jack is the bee’s knees when it comes to sound.

Björk’s ‘You’ve Been Flirting Again’ lyric “Give her some time, give her some space” was right. But maybe there’s such a thing as TOO much time, and TOO much space… We need people. We need close friends. Otherwise we go insane, you see. La-la-la-la-la, boop-a-dee-boop-boop wa-wa-wa, sha-MONE!… Like that.

Apologies, Ben, if I got this all entirely wrong, and the song is actually about your wife.

Are you old enough to remember when I wrote that spoof episode of Cheers? I bet you’re pleased I didn’t do the same for Friends. Could I BE any more longwinded?

If a friend contacts you after so long and asks “What happened?”, just tell them “We were ON a BREAK!!”

Listen to 𝙋𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝𝙤 (𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙃𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙞) on the 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿 Spotify playlist HERE!

Listen to 𝙋𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝𝙤 (𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙃𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙞) on the 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘆’𝘀 𝗖𝗼𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗿 Apple Music playlist HERE!

Listen to 𝙋𝙨𝙮𝙘𝙝𝙤 (𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙃𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙞) on YouTube HERE!

Follow 𝙗𝙞𝙜𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙙𝙗𝙚𝙣 on Instagram HERE!

Follow 𝙗𝙞𝙜𝙗𝙖𝙡𝙙𝙗𝙚𝙣 on TwiX HERE!

Please share this post and let me know your thoughts in the comments below